We don’t have to “deal”

Today, I went to a sex store I’ve been to before. There was one car in the parking lot about 10 minutes after the store opened. I assumed it was the employee. I walked in and saw her sweeping. I continued into the back portion of the store and for the next 15 minutes until I left, she hung over my shoulder. This woman was white and I am not. 

For the first time, in a long time, I felt that I was being racially targeted. Most of my friends and lovers have been white. As a result, I haven’t had to deal with or be exposed to racism. I am very grateful that I’ve had very few racist experiences. 

When someone is covertly racist, I feel uncomfortable, bothered, like something is “off.” Later I realize what was occurring. This reminds me that using my voice is very important. I need to advocate and defend myself. If something feels weird, if someone is making me uncomfortable, I don’t just have to deal. No one should have to. 

Prose: Black Man

Sexy. Smart. Doing his thang. Met him in Café Passé with the sun at his back. He’s got me stretching to see him. Reading’s not necessary. He makes himself plain. Business card and all. Oh and we both have bomb hair. Screenwriter from Cali, I wonder what he’s like in motion. Pierre. Nice to meet you.

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